Tiger's Tail - end of 2010

It's year end! Time to wrap this year up, since I have 2 days for myself and myself only. =D

This is not a glorious year, but a meaningful in its own way.

The proudest achivements that I have are:

1. Realizing my dreams to realize my parents' dream, travelling around the world. It does not stop here though, it's kinda something ongoing. =D

I know that Mom and Dad enjoying themselves. For Mom it's seeing the new places, experiencing something new. For dad it's the meeting with new people and of course, the photos snapping. For me, it's the gathering and the joy in seeing them happy. =D

2. I can finally SWIM. Yeah! I mean swim as it moves from one end to another end of a swimming pool. Best thing is It's NON-STOP! and the fact is I Love swimming!

While I am so proud in achieving the above, I had several other things that I think I could do slightly better. But done is done, so I am proud to say that I have achived what I have set in the past 12 months.

3. Read and Write more... I completed 9 new books (Being Happy, Things that I want my daughters to know, With a Little faith, Dear John, The Appeal, Love in Torn Land, Eat Pray Love, Open Heart, English as Second Language). It's lesser than I would like to, but when I recall, I had been pausing from reading, as I have problems with my eyes at the middle of the year. Once you stop, it takes time to warm up the engine again. Haha...

Butttttt... I write more this year~ 72 posts (including this one =D). There might be one or two more before the year really ends :)

4. The race... I ran for a cause in July this year, Race against cancer. Frankly, I love the feeling that I felt during the run, it was different in every kilometer that I had conquered. Really... finishing the race was nothing, it's more on the process. Will do it again next year~ =D

Then... there are actions that I had taken and I think they are good ones, such as;

5. Starting my 'piggy bank'~ Never too late is the word! I had started, and I just need to continue.

6. Moving in to a better place. Despite all the hassle, it's worth it! Stepping in to the house, I feel home! No screaming. While they care for me, I still have my privacy. A lot of laughter (especially grandma's laughter). What can be better when you are in a foreign land?

7. Giving back. I have decided that volunteers would not really in my list anymore. It does not close the chances that I will be doing it in the future, if I am given a chance. Greatest thing about giving, when I have no time, I am blessed enough to contribute in other form. As always, when I help others, I realize that they actually had helped me more~

I hate to admit it but this year, keeping a better health, is a Total Failure.

I can't recall when I started drinking coffee, by the time I realize that I love it and am addicted to it when I had it almost every day. Even with the knowledge that I am going to suffer if I do not stop, I still drank it. Anyway, lesson learnt, the hard way. Really Hard!

Also, I was not determined enough to get my butt in to the gym 2-3 times a week, even I know that I will feel good when I walk out from there.

No matter how it has been, it's the best 2010 that I can have~ :)

Majority that are NOT supposed to rule

Was reading the paper, that in Indonesia, some people are making noise because of the Christmas decoration that are being put up in the shopping mall during this festive season.

I was thinking, what's the problem with that? It's ridiculous!

Many Indonesians come to Singapore to celebrate Christmas and New Year, doesn't it something that they need to be worried about? People are no longer feeling safe in their own land, their home, at least I do, for the first time in my life. =(

It's a democratic country. Since young, we are taught that there are five religions that are acknowledged in our country. We were asked to mention it during our exam. It sticks! All of us have the right to choose our own believe (even if you do not believe any, you still need to choose, for your identity card purpose =p). Thus, all of us have the right to celebrate our own holy days.

I am not a Christian, I am not really celebrating Christmas, but you know what? It does not bother me that the believers are celebrating Christmas, in their very own ways, sharing the joy with others, non-believers. Respect others for that. If this is bother some people, does it mean being happy is a Crime now?

The decorations are not meant to 'christianized' others, and don't they think it's such a silly reason for people to convert because of that. Phew~

Majority does not always rule! For the sake of World Peace, Please RESPECT others!

Latest update

Merry Christmas! It's Christmas and I am home, luckily not alone. Haha...

Anyway, was doing 'Winter-Christmas' cleaning... Clearing all my tables top from all mediciations that I have dilligently consumed and used for the past few days. Being ill is BAD! REALLY BAD! especially when your mom is not around to take care of you. You feel pain, sick, and quite often you find yourselves crying to sleep. =( Anyway, recovering now, and am eating like a piggy, almost every hour! Phew~ After the suffering that I managed to shed off some weight, hope this does not gain me more of the pounds.

Cause of this, on the first list of resolution for next year and I really will commit (as of now =p) is to keep myself healthy! The reason is I Hate Hospital, despite I am working in one.

Anyway, Wish Everyone a Merry Christmas and a Healthy and Wealthy New Year 2011.

P.S. Thanks to all friends & my landlord and the helper for taking care of me when I was sick! =D

Greatest Wealth

If you are granted one wish, ask for health and health only!

It's the greatest wealth that one can have.

You need it to enjoy your food!

You need it to gather with your family & friends, and to really have a good time!

You need it to do things you like!

You need it to make a living or... even a fortune!

Mommy Mommy

You will only know the feeling of being a mom when You have already become one, that what my sister told me...

A lot of emotional involvements in raising the children; the feeling of joy, proud, heartfelt symphaty, and sometimes, pain...

I would not say that my sister is the best mommy; she is emotionally unstable (I guess this is not genetic, but definitely it runs in the family of our generation) and sometimes can be very childish, but one thing for sure, she is hanging on there and doing her best! That's the best already, in my opinon.

Recently, she had unintentionally hurt her daughter, and was feeling so so so guilty, regret and most of it is pain.

To keep the story short, the daughter got 3 stitches on her upper lip after the unfortunate incident. Back from the hospital, my sister was still crying (my niece had already stop crying by then), then my niece come to her mom, wipe off her mom's tear and told her: "Mommy, adult cannot cry, only small kids who cry".

How sweet she is~

Then, my sis asked her "don't you hate mommy?"

My niece said "no la~~~" *smiling

She is like a warm sunshine, she melts my heart, she melts her mom's heart~

My sister is a proud and lucky mommy. My parents are proud and lucky grandparents. Not forgetting myself, I am a very proud aunt~

Confused?

The main character in the novel that I am reading, alternately with another book, has this part where the main character was faced with the formerly-hateful dorm-mate. The dorm mate is feeling down as he is just being dumped by his girlfriend because of political reason. Silly... but whatever it is, that's not my point...

The part that caught me is that the main character was said quite relief as the dorm-mate seemed to be finished with the actual sobbing.

The book mentioned that we all used to our own crying, but anyone else's made us uncomfortable. it's so true! It's already so hard to deal with our own, do not mention others. Phew~ You will never know what to do, or what they want you to do. Some people want hugging, and some people wish you would just leave them to it. It was all too confusing.

Most of the time, I will not ask too much when someone is not feeling well. I either will just stay quite, comfort a bit or sometime I will scold them, mind you though... if you are not too closed and that person does not feel loved enough to take your scolding, you better stay quite... I am not a pro in comforting others, and another consideration is that try to put yourself in their shoes. For me, it would be much easier to calm down when I am left alone.

Anyway, I have my own believe that living in this world is not easy, but it's not difficult as well, most of the time, when people need help, especially to people we are closed with, we will ask, or at least I will...

So, it might be confusing what one should do when they are faced with moody or emotionally unstable people, but just bear in mind, most people will tell you what to do... Some will start to share with you their issues, it means they need your pair of ears. Some will start asking you questions, it means they need your opinon. Some others would just stay quite, it means they would like you to do the same.

The reason that it's all very complicated, becuase you are dealing with human!

Someone...

Someone have dreamt of something, achieved it and now thinking whether the sacrifices made are worth what achieved.

Someone has been sitting on the car for 2 hours. Reason: Overwork! Business has been going so well, that he is trying so hard to cope, and now... tired. Instead of going back home, he chose to stay in his car, enjoying his own companion.

Someone is living in abundance, but has never stopped complaining. No time, No money, Have nothing. In fact, he has almost everything! A lot of people would love to be him, or rather to have whatever he has and live with gratitude.

Someone have chosen the path of life she will be living. She is now living it, not the perfect desired fairy tale, but she hangs on! Cried a bit, get herself up and seeing things clearer and happier now...

Someone... think differently

Someone... live different life story

Someone... hang on

Someone... continue to live on~

WWF Campaign: Sustainable Seafood

On my way to work, I passed by a few bus stops with the advertisment board displaying a plate of very delicious looking raw salmon/tuna (I was guessing). I, personally, am not a fan of raw food, but even so, I still think it looks so good that it will make salmon/tuna eaters' mouths water.

The advertisment attracted me, not only because of the picture of the tuna (which I later found out when my bus stopped right in front of the board, thus I can read a few lines of the ads copy), but I saw a logo of World Wild Life (WWF) on it. Yes, on my mission to care a bit for wild life, I signed up for WWF's newsletter a few years ago, but has stopped reading it now.

Anyway, the point is... Yes, the ads with the very well-taken picture of tuna is not the advertisments put up by any Japanese restaurants. It's the campaign by World Wild Life (WWF) to encourage Singaporeans to consume sustainable seafood and also as part of its marine conservation efforts. Read the details of the campaign which is conceptualized by the creative agency, Ogilvy and Mather.

It's actually a creative idea, the ads copy is Great! It makes you ashamed of yourself for eating the seafood. Read for yourself here.

However, I personally think the ads creates the opposite effect when I first look at it. My first impression is definitely not what WWF would love to hear. What do you think of the following?

Looking at the poster above, what's crossed your mind? I guess More of "Wow... It looks delicious", "Gourmet", "Haven't had raw salmon/tuna for a while..." and Less of "It's awful", "I am not going to have tuna or salmon anymore..."

P.S. I have no intention to offend the creative team. Just my personal opinion. I am fully supportive with the effort they put in promoting this campaign!

Ordinary Family Dinner

I have only one wish tonight, when I was passing by our neighbour's house. The family was having dinner together, an ordinary and Real family dinner.

I wish that when I am home, there will be mom in the kitchen, dad in the living room. Then after I finish bathing, I will help mom preparing our dinner.

*Slap*

I need to wake up! I am in a foreign land, all alone! No matter how ordinary my wish is, I can forsee that for the next few years, this "ordinary-family-dinner-routine" won't happen too often. It will be too sad for me to count, as it will be only a handful of days I have spend at home in a year. Believe it or not, for the past few years, I have only maximum of 7 days at home annually. ="(

I agree that I see more things here, I experience more, I learn more, I have become more open-minded. I am grateful for that. However, if I am allowed to be greedy, I will ask for one more thing: While I can still see, experience and learn more here, I also wish that I can be with my family more often. People I love and love me back without asking nothing in return~

Almost ended~

Time flies~ In few more days, it's DECEMBER, the last month of the year!

Was checking my resolutions for 2010, and I might not be too proud of myself. =(

What have I achieved? Where have I been? Have I improved?

Whatever it is, one thing for sure, I do not wish to go back. I just want to go forward and do my best again... At least, I still have a month time to do something that can add some values to Chapter 23 of my life.

Anyway, I might be afraid that this year ends with nothing significant, but for a few days already, I have been logging in to this blog, thinking to write a wrap up post for the year of 2010. I saw some valueable things in life, experienced it, one of my dream is realized. This part of me thinks this year is not completely a bad one. However, another part of me had made me to logout, to ensure that I make a good use of the month of December, so the posting, the year end wrap-up will not be too ugly, too disapointing.

Fighting~ (I intended to write "Good Luck", but it seems that luck is not what I need)

Say the right thing!

There are a few words that we should get ourselves used to them. It's "Please", "Thank You" and "Sorry"

On my way, home tonight, a guy's bag (I guess it was 3 kg at least) hit my head, and he only said "Oops"

OOPS! O-O-P-S!!! Can you imagine?

I was so angry not only because my head is hurting now, but because, he doesn't seem to care.

Gosh! God Bless Him!

Hope!

We, human, should keep on trying, and need to know the time to let go!

But...

The only thing that you should not let go is HOPE!

It's my pleasure~

Today is an unplanned day! I did plan... I want to wake up early, read my book, go to temple (hmmm...), go to bookstore, shop for a bit, then... am going for swimming. At the end, only the first one was realized.

I woke up early (consider early for a holiday), then... I just finished bathing, and I got an sms which at the end, I found myself at work. There go my temple visit, bookstore and shopping plan.

Then, when I was about to leave, I received a phone call. Tadaaaaa... another unplanned, my childhood friend is in town. I know that she is, but I do not know when she is going to contact me, and it's today! There go my swimming. BUT I am happy that she called. =D

Tonight was well-spent. She is my neighbor's grand grand daughter (her grand grandma loved me so much, I was closer to her than to my own grandma). We were a very good friend before. I can't remember when she started visiting her family (grandma, grandpa, uncle, aunties who are all my neighbor) less often OR it's me who visit her family less often? Most likely, it's the latter. I guessed it's after her grand grandma passed away.

And last year during Chinese New Year, we met again! (I always visit her grandma and grandpa and of course to pay my respect to her grand grandma, every year when I am back home for CNY) That's how she got my name card and Facebook connects us =D

Anyway, tonight we talked about our childhood time: how her grand grandma loved both of us, how her grand grandma would come to my school and scolded my classmate who made me cried, how we were the queens of all kids in her grandpa's house (in that little town, their house was known as Rumah Gedong, meaning: Big House. Last time, at least when all her family were gathered together there are at least 7 kiddos running around, and you would still feel, you can actually throw in another 7 kiddos and there are still space for you to 'dance'!), how we sang on the stage at her uncle's wedding dinner (song title: Abang Tukang Bakso) and we did not finish the song, as we couldn't remember the lyrics but we still got a lot of red packets from the guests.

It was 15 years ago, at least!

My friend's mom has always been good to me as well. I remember she bought me a very cute pencil case that my mom will not be buying that kind of thing for me before. haha... It was during my primary school time. I remembered I still had it with me when I was in my senior high school. Then I misplaced it... Or it's because I was starting to earn my own money, then I appreciated things lesser at that time. My bad~ =(

When I sent them off, they were saying thank you. I do not know how to translate it to Hokkien, but I just want to let them know: "It's my pleasure"

Looking back~

Here I am, my body is aching, my head is aching, but I just need to jot this down!

There were a few kids (ehm kids... I mean those are not grown-ups yet... ) in our neighborhood who were playing and screaming... happily, I believe. AND somehow I got irritated by them!

Then the thought of being irritated by those loud and happily screaming kids shocked me! I AM OLD! Gosh~

My mind was rushing for memories! I need to find it back; the memories, the feeling. I assure myself that I am not too old YET... I am trying to relate with my childhood time where I was as naughty as them, as loud as them, as free as them, as happy as them.

I found it back!!! I still can easily recall those memories, and I reassure myself, the memories are still CRYSTAL clear. Old people can't do this.

*Relieve*

P.S. Sometime, we need to look back. Give yourself a pat on the back for those good achievements! Give yourself a pat on the back for had conquered the bad times with flying colors!

Eat, Pray, Love

I fall in love with "Eat Pray Love". The book!!! I watched the movie, but I have no comment about it, except a big THANK YOU for giving our beautiful Bali a very good exposure. "Terima Kasih."

Anyway, back to the book... I have not finished it yet (now am at 'Indonesia' chapters), and I basically have been glued to it, except when I am at work.

The book bored me a little during the first 36 chapters, where it was in Italy, good food, beautiful city and language, but I am just a bit bored. Then... it started to get me addicted when her story in India begin.

I envy the main character, which is also the writer of the book, for having the opportunity, the courage, the financial support to have the taste of 3 different countries for that year round. That was kind of life that I am dreaming for (although I know one day, apparently, people need to settle down). But for once being A Citizen of the World, it's just my dream!

I will not be summarzing the book, but I know if I own the book, there will be a lot, a lot, a lot of bookmarks that I will have pasted to it =D

The Ketut Liyer with his style of meditation (how can you meditate, keeping all smiley face, and LIVER? =D), the poet friend, the Richard from Texas, the idea of serving God by serving people who you love and care for, are things that get me all excited about this book.

P.S. Those who love beauty and gourmet will definitely love Italy, Those who are seekers will love India, Those who are Indonesian will Love Indonesia, Those who have sensitive heart will love this book :)

Backpack and Guilt

My mind was wondering around this early morning. I was thinking about those backpackers, then I started to have this little conversation in my head.

Linda: Don't you feel heavy?

Backpackers: No, you just need a good backpack...

Then I was arguing, hmm... imagine and compare: you WITH your backpack and you WITHOUT your backpack... you will definitely feel the difference.

Then I suddenly start to relate it to 'guilt'. people who walk around with guilt all this while, have never realized how heavy it is for their mind, their heart, until one day they choose and they have been freed from the guilty feeling, then they realize that they can walk around (live) much ligther.

The moral of the story is that "Do not be too comfortable when you carry around a good backpack! It might be filled with those unnecessary things that you should unload to lighten your every step"

What a morning~

Lie

The only truth about 'lie' is once you start, you can't never stop.

You need to continue to cover the first, and... there will never be a 'last lie'.

So... please stop lying before you really can't!

P.S. Mad with a liar~

Happiness

What makes you really happy?


I realize that I find the real happiness in the small things that I do.

I find my happiness in reading the books written by my favorite writers

I find my happiness in listening to the songs sang by my favorite singers

I find my happiness in my clean and organized room

I find my happiness in seeing my cute little niece talks

I find my happiness in writing this short post for my blog

I find my happinenss looking at the photos of my parents

I find my happiness when I think I had made someone feel good about themselves

I find happiness when I am planning for my future, knowing that I have purposes in life

Finally, some people said happiness is only real, when it's shared. Thus... I am sharing it with you!

Wish everyone can find their very own happiness~

For (a lot of) Reasons, We Exist!

We all wanna be somebody.

Most people die...

Leave a name which is being mentioned from time to time...

Leave a story of their life which is being told from generation to generations, or...

There are some who make it big, real big; their name is written down, their story is then being published, or be part of the curriculum in the history, physic, or social classes...

Mother Teresa once said:

"If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one." (Exactly! you can be somebody who is useful, helpful, being remembered for the good you've done, by just helping one who is really in need)


Then Dalai Lama loves to include the following in his prayers:

"So long as space remains
So long as sentient beings remain,
I will remain,
In order to help in order to serve,
In order to make my own contribution."

We all exist for reasons. We are all born to live with compassion, to help who are in need. We are all born to be Somebody.

Love! - Hebe

我愛你 你愛她
她愛她 她愛他

你愛我 我愛他
他愛他 他愛她

咦
怎麼這世界 已經沒有人相愛
怎麼這世界 每個人都不快樂
怎麼這世界 每個人都愛別人 不愛自己

扎西德勒 (Zha Xi De Le)

Greeting from Jiu Zhai Gou~


Zha Xi De Le! According to the people there, it's the best greeting that ever exists, in chinese it means ji xiang ru yi, which wish other good fortune and receive everything that they desire.

Back home is good, but it's always fun to see and experience, the culture, the life of others. In this China trip, half of the time were spent in the mountain areas where the minority of Tibetian, known as dong zang, lives.

I salute how most of them still keep their culture so strongly; their costume, the way they greet others, and their belief in the power of the earth and God.

Along the way of our bus ride to different places, I can see those small flags in red, yellow, green, blue and white colors which are representing fire (sun), earth (land), jungle (according to Wikipedia it symbolizes water), sky and air, respectively. It's the prayer flags.

I love to listen the story of every simple thing in their daily life. Most of the time, it's based on certain belief. It's just interesting =D

Anyway, my second night back in Singapore and my room still as messy as 14 days before, with an additional luggage of laundry to do.

Took about 1,000+ photos and 80+ videos... Let me sort it out this weekend~

Best thing about the trip is that Parents were enjoying themselves and we are all back home safely. :)

P.S. My niece (older one) is hospitalized, hope she is recovering soon.

The Peak

I wonder when was the last time that I ever have a clean page in my agenda. The last two weeks are the peak time. Today, I need to paste a sticky note to a page for 1 Oct 2010, as I am running out of space to jot down my to do list.

It's kinda fun, actually, despite the restless days. Time passes so fast, that I do not even realize that lunch time has passed, and not long after that it's time to go home. Best part, after wondering around, settling stuff, then I am finally home, bath, online, sleep, and everything starts all over again: busy day, slower evening, and quite night.

P.S. On my way to the airport, picking up mom and dad, and tomorrow, around the same time, we will be in the cab to the airport to Chengdu.

My first trip to China will be 'OLD' with aunties and parents and hopefully Good. Have never been to a family trip withouth my sis and her family. How I wish they can make it to this trip. Hahh~

Random

A lot of things are going on in my mind, but I do not have the time to sit, focus and write it down properly, in a good flow, at the end, I signed in, I chose a title, I started to write, I stumbled, I saved it as a draft, I signed out. I have 5 or 6 drafts waiting to be edited and finalized...

Lately, 24 hours seems are not enough! Not enough sleep, yet still not enough time to do what I want to do.

Anyway, a very quick update is another 4 days, at this very same time, I will be on my may to the airport with Dad and Mom, flying to Chengdu, to Jiu Zhai Gou. I am not tooooooo excited about this trip, despite the 'legend' on how beautiful the place is. It's known as the heaven on earth. Wow~

The only thing that I am happy about is I am fulfilling my other dreams, realizing my parents' other dream =) I am proud that I have the capability to do it.

Here comes the random. Some other things that I heard, I felt, I would like to share, and I would like to remember by writing it down are:

1. Learning which has no end

2. Tension of Opposite

3. Being famous; the Hall of fame

4. The joy in giving, or even just to be in the place where 'giving' is a culture

Hope I can post one of these before leaving for the longest holiday that I ever have for the last 2 years =D

Good excuse?

A lady was selling tissue to pedestrians...

Another lady passed by and seemed irritated and telling whoever that want to listen "She is so young and selling tissue. She should find a job!" can't remember what she was saying, anyway, the point's made!

The tissue-seller lady said, "You cannot say that, you know, my sister is even worse................", defending herself

Gosh~ I thought that was funny, how she defended herself. That's not a good excuse AT ALL.

"My sister is even worse?????" phew~

We, women...

"ehmmm ehmmm *

We, women, should say less of "If I were a man, I would have... (done some men's stuff)"

Yeah, right... if you still live in your grandma's era.

We, women, should say more of "Because I am a woman, I am now ... (doing some men's stuff)"

Do it better than what the average men can do.

Giving

Best part of being alive is that we have the ability to give. Giving financial support or a few hours of our time... to serve, or when we think we do not have enough of both, we are still able to give our Love, the only thing that we are born with.

I am blessed for being able to give, not much, but just enough for myself, for those who I know and I love, and those who I do not know but deserve to be loved!

I know how good the feeling is to receive something, the feeling of being cared for. Most of us should know... experience it. Thus, I feel bad that the feeling about receiving lesser now ever crossed my mind.

Feeling grateful for having enough!

Feeling grateful for being able to give!

Feeling grateful that I am still able to feel the joy in giving!

Love Myself More~

Do you ever think that you love others more than you love yourself?

I thought every human is a narcissistic by nature.

Now, I found out that there are people who live for others.

It's touching...

But~ at the same time it's sad...

Waiting~

The feeling can be disappointing and rewarding. How I hope the latter come more often~

Are you living your dream(s)?

Was watching "Step Up 3" last Sunday. It's kinda make me think whether everyone is living their dreams?

In the movie, each individual is said born to dance. It must feel good to know what you are born to do, and then most importantly do it whole heartedly.

Most people dream to be something. We start very young. Our teachers will ask us to write an essay on who we want to be in another 20 years. Then, we start to write about the profession which we often see, often heard, often read about; Doctor, Teacher, Pilot, Policeman, Stewardess, and the list go on... I guess, kids think it's just cool to be in uniform.

Kids then grow up. A very few of us stick to the essay that we wrote years back. We then go with the flow, following the trend, pursuing career to what make sense in the era that we live in.

Some dream to be a pilot, but giving it up, as it seems to be not so realistic. Then go into business, make it big, and happy to say that he is born to do business.

Some love to do business, who also talented in music. He then become your idol. Along the way, he starts his business in music/fashion related industry, and Boom! He is now your trendsetter.

There are people with religious view who see themselves walking the path as a priest, at the end, not forgetting the same strong belief, they are now engineer, scientist, the profession that they had never think of before.

Some 'gangster' in your high school become a police officer, and very dedicated to what he is doing now. It's life! :D

We all have a dream(s), to do what we love to do, what we are passionate in. However, along the way, practicality might be more important in life (sad but it's it!), thus we choose another path. Walking through it, we apparentely found it interesting, challenging, and in some cases it brings us closer to our dreams. What can be better?

I guess, not everybody can live the dreams in the way how they would like it to be, the way they have always dreamt it. Don't give up! By stopping, it get you nowhere. Not walking the path that we have always wanted it to be, does not mean that we are not living our dreams. As long as we are holding it tight, I will say I am on the way there!

Some say it just right "Don't Dream Your Life, Live Your Dream"

*Am I comforting myself? I will say I am not... But I need to confess that sometime I am lost! Fortunately, most of the time, I found my way back in track. Blessed~

Language or Listening Skill?

I think most of us agree that language plays a role in better communication.

However, I realize that to listen, to adapt and the effort in trying to understand are more important in communication and human interaction, specifically.

Lesson learnt from my current landlady (older lady who speaks only Chinese and Hokkien in Shanghai accent, and also her native dialect, Wen Zhou. Defintely speaks no English and Bahasa) and her helper (Indonesian, who originally speaks Javanese and Bahasa only).

When they both speak, joke and laugh, frankly, sometimes I am lost. I am not trying hard enough, I guess.

Creative People or Sharp Observers with Sensitive Heart?

The way to start writing isn't by writing at all, but by living.

It isn't about creating something from thin air, but about documenting our personal feelings about the things that we see.

Or to Put it Crudely, How are you going to be a storyteller if you have no story to tell?

Perhaps, in the end, there are no such things as creative people; there are only sharp observers with sensitive heart

... Yasmin Ahmad, Malaysian visionary...

Merdeka Indonesiaku!

Selamat Ulang Tahun ke - 65, Tanah Air ku~

Always love the celebration during my high school and college time in Malaysia. Miss that time~

The time when the band would play the song by Cokelat, Bendera! (It had always been this song~)

....
merah putih tetaplah kau berkibar
diujung tiang tertinggi
Indonesia ku ini
....

Merdeka!!!

Sorry that I missed it~

Changing phone, moving house, busy working, busy entertaining others, there is no acceptable reasons to forget my best friend's birthday. =(

I don't know how she felt, but I know that I feel so bad bad bad!

Forgive me~ Wishes come a bit later, but All my best to you~ Not able to wish you a happy birthday, but I guess not too late to wish you happy days this year round.

Send her a little card. Hope that we can be friend until we grow old. Then, for the coming 40 to 50 years, I will never forget your birthday. Promise~

Love you not less than before~ even more, for reminding me that I forget, give me the chance to redeem~ Thank you~


Love you, Wen~

Sad Ending

Realize that it's sad that it had to end the way it was. :(

Who are we doing it for?

Most of the time, I do things for myself. The reason: ..., because I like to do so. ..., becasue I love to do it. ..., becuase it's good thing to do. ..., because this will be useful, for me and for others. There is also times, that I do it, because I am told not to do it.

A lot of time, I do it because I know people I love will be proud, happy, or rest-assured, when I do so. In the other words, I do it for others, people I love, I respect!

Which one is better? Do it for yourself or Do it for others?

The perfect answer will be: a balance of both!

However, in the not-so-perfect world, and as a not-so-perfect individual, the perfect answer might not be so perfect, afterall. There is always one reason, either for you or for others, that out-weigh the other.

I always like to think that things surrounding us are all RELATIVE, depending on how we see it. For me, it so much more important that we feel great after whatever we do, it can be something beneficial for us, but definitely not something Harmful to others.

Good Friend

Was exchanging messages with a very close friend.

If I think back, not sure why I can be so close to her. In a lot of things, we are just different, yet I am comfortable with her, a person who I have always turn to when I need a shoulder to rest. My dad even insisted that we should become god sister. haha

We were discussing about "being stressed out".

The scenario:

Me: Stressed, and would like to be alone
Her: Stressed, and need a company

Happened at the same time.

Her: want me to accompany her
Me: do not want to accompany her, as want to be alone

My Question: will you be mad at me?
Her Answer: If I am stressed, I believe you will never refuse to keep me accompany. Then, when you are stressed, I will try not to leave you alone, whenever possible (she joked that to prevent me from doing anything silly. Gosh! never cross my mind~) I will not be mad, anyway.

Ah~ What have I done before that I deserve such a good friend, friend with wings :')

Need to...

I found the word "Need to, but Don't Want to"

There are things that are done because we need to get it done, although it's something that we might not be comfortable with. Sometimes, it can be a great deal as we are going against what we believe in, but most of the time, we manage to find the reasons to do it, feel bad, and move on. Life is easier this way!

Change has never been easy. I find myself changes a Lot, and I have hard time dealing with it, when I realize it, e.g. I do not really laugh at something silly anymore and I do not enjoy talking about something unnecessary anymore.

It's something I need to get it done, because I am grown up! I can't dress an adult and still bring my childhood's toys around, can I?

I do not know why am I so stressed out because of this things, I have the right to change to be a better person. I have to be nice to myself. For those people who can't understand, "bye bye". I still believe, have faith that there are a few people, family friends who will still have their arm wide open to hug me, have their ears to listen to me, have their heart to talk to me. For them; "thank you."

Careless

IF only...

I can be a bit careless...

in everything that I have done
in everything that I am doing
in everything that I am going to do


I will be much happier, I suppose.

Mocha White Coffee

The last time when I drank white coffee from old town was in LCCT, waiting for my parents' flight to arrive for my convocation, August, last year!

After almost a year, I have forgotten how good their coffee is. Drank it last night, and again... I was back to the kopitiam tonight, for the my favourite Mocha white coffee.

Stomach is upset, but... I am happy :)

*Taking my Actal, then sleep*

My First Run

Here I am, super sleepy, but feel that I have to note it down, before the 'good feeling' dries off.

Yup! Am talking about my first 5km run, yesterday. I finally survived and completed the run. I think I am doing great. Well... to be fair I would like to say "better than some others." Giving my best, is the best part.

I found reaching the finish line is not the main point, nor how long it takes to finish it, it's the 'journey' in finishing the run which is great!

When I first see the sign "1 km", I feel 4km more to go. I then passed the 2km sign, half way to go. Then I ran pass the 3 km sign, I thought 'this is my limit during my practice in the gym, but today I feel I still can run another 3km'. Last, the greatest feeling was not when I reached the finish line, but when I passed the 4km, I know I am going to complete that run, and I did!

During my first 15 minutes in the bus home, I felt like smiling~ People might think I am nuts. Well, with a pair of muddy shoes, dirty training pants, wet hair, sleepy face, Oh~ Perfect! Anyway, the rest of almost 2 hours bus ride, I slept! Didn't care :p

Lesson that I learnt: Most of the time, things are not as difficult as it seems to be. Always take things step by step. It never fails!

Read the news today, the event has collected a sum of fund that will be donated to Singapore Cancer Foundation. Our prayer with you all, Fighters!

The Guide to Daily Living

I was attending the Rotary Club installation dinner last week. They distributed the Rotary Club newsletter, introducing the president, vice president, and other fellow Rotarians. Also, it summarizes the activities that the club has been doing, then there is this article titled as "The Guide to Daily Living".

It says "The 'Guide' serves to remind Rotarians of their priorities when doing 'Service Above Self' and when executing their obligations applying the object of Rotary."

However, I find that asking these questions to ourself will also help us to realize or it is simply reminding some important things in Life that we have overlooked.

Below is the higlight of the article. Stop and Think!

1. Have I spent some time in self-examinations?

This prompts us to evaluate ourselves and our ability to serve.

2. Have I spent quality time with my family?

This reiterates our commitment to our family - often neglected in the hustle and bustle of modern life, in same cases, we just take things for granted.

3. Have I given my best to my work?

This is reminder of the need to commit ourselves to work excellence and the practice of high ethical standard.

4. Have I given some time to someone near and far?

This prods us to remember the many less fortunate among us, at home and abroad, who need a helping hand - so taht we would "Lend A Hand". Such acts always lead to promotion of goodwill, understanding, and peace.

Have I?

Excuse me!

Out of main 3 things that bothering me now, there is one that I can easily solve. The damn Landlady who is NUTS. She is simply just has problem. She needs not a neurologist for her 'monthly migraine', she needs not a gastro specialist for her 'moody gastric', she simply just needs a Psychiatrist for her sickness.

If I were all alone by myself, I certainly have called the agent to help me find a new room. However, I am now with a roommate, so will give another month, and start searching now.

I do not feel bad for cursing her! She is the second person that I am so mad at. Maybe the first one that I will not forgive for her rudeness for people who cares for her (her current husband), and will always feel disgusted due to her cowardness in facing people (which I believe it's not only towards me).

I need to remember this so that in the future, when I meet some difficult to handle people, I know that they are not as bad as this one. (finger crossed) She laid out a 'rule' which I tried very hard to follow. Damn her! I am so stupid to let this kind of person setting 'rule' in my life.

She said (via her husband, she is a bitch coward that has never dare to talk to me on her own), she gives me Friday and Saturday to do my laundry. I do realize that it will be a bit hard to follow, but to avoid more conflict, or should I say to be a bit tolerate to the psycho, I just say yes!

As agreed, no matter, how late it is, the first thing I do when I reach home on Friday night is to wash my cloth! I normally bath, and sit around waiting for my laundry! This Friday, she had her cloth hung around during my 'allocated laundry day!' So, I can only did my laundry this afternoon.

She woke up this evening, finding my laundry, she called her husband, which I found out because, as always, her husband will call us (my roommate for today) afterwards, this time as the topic goes, asking about the laundry.

First of all, she gave the two days to me, and now she is complaining about it, while in the first place she is the one srcewed up the schedule.

I will not try so hard to tweak this shit so that the story will have a moral, a positive lesson to learn from it. She is NOT worth the effort! No matter how I see her, she is a coward, wearing an occasionally 'forced smiling mask', with no appreciation for others.

The only thing that I am thankful for is that I do not have to live with this kind of people for the rest of my life. I still hope that one day she will have the time to sit and think why her life is so screwed up, why she can't stay in the job for more than 2 months, why her son does not bother to talk to her, and swear in front her. She has so much bad things happen in her life, and she still complains that it's others' fault.

One thing I know for sure, when we are not getting along with a person, maybe it is simply just not the perfect match, but if we are not getting along with a lot of people, should start thinking that there might be something wrong with us!

Post with hatred! Excuse me!

Panic

A week left, half the race to go.

Random thoughts

I feel bad about myself who complains a lot lately, because outsiders have been affecting my life, my mood so much! I hate it! I hate people who complain, I hate myself even more when I complain.

I talked to a friend, she had been a very good listener. Sometimes, I need just a pair of ears to listen , really listen, and not commentting. Thank her for doing so, when I much need it.

Done a bit of thinking about responsibility, about giving our best and about the fact that we cannot change people.

Responsibility & Giving our Best

Each individual has responsibilities. The only that we can do about these responsibilities is to give in our best in fullfilling them. If each individual can just do what they are supposed to do, most likely 'helping hand' is not so much needed. I am not saying that we can now live without others, which we certainly CAN'T. Giving example; saying that if nobody is littering, everybody is doing their responsibility in keeping the environment clean, cleaner won't be out of job, but they certainly will have less unpleasant things to do, won't they?

If after giving your best you are still not achieveing the expected? It means your best is just isn't good enough! Feel good about the process that you have tried hard, next is to try harder.

Changing People

I should realize and should not be too upset that I cannot change the habit of others. The fact is nobody can. Good and Bad are relative. Nobody is perfect, and thus, some of us try to work towards perfection which we realize we can't, but still this is the process of giving our best. This is about the principle which some people live in, including me. This principle might not be 100% right for some people who do not believe so! Anyway, Right and Wrong are relative too.

The thoughts are so random, that I do not know how I should conclude them.

1GOAL: Education For All

Received a message from Singtel. They are promoting the "1Goal: Education for all" campaign.

The purpose of this campaign is to raise as many voices as possible, all over the world, ro rally our support and call on world leaders to make education a reality for the 72 million out-of-school boys and girls by 2015.

See what Queen Rania of Jordan (Co-Founder and Global Co-Chair of 1GOAL campaign) said:

"This is our chance to show not just out-of-school children, but our own children, that when we make a promise, we keep it. With your help, we could have billions of fans cheering not just for their teams, but for one team: 1GOAL. This is our moment to shine; we can bring millions of children in from the shadows of ignorance, and light up their lives with the legacy of education."

I thought it's cool!

I don't watch football. The game is too slow, I think. For you guys who watch and have a team who you support, or a player who you admire, joining this campaign might help you to connect to your star. *Persuading* :P

Even myself, who are no fan of Football, for this year I join Rio Ferdinand and Michael Carrick from Manchester United, in supporting this campaign. 1GOAL will be my 'favourite' goal of the year. =D

Find out more about this campaign from:

1GOAL: Education for all official website

Join their Facebook page

Join Them by clicking on the link below:

1GOAL official website
1GOAL by Singtel

To football fan, enjoy the rest of 2010 FIFA World Cup season =D

Happy Daddy's Day!

To my not-so-perfect, yet great Dad ever: Happy Father's Day! Love You~

Sent a card home, but I think it still stuck somewhere in the post office. Bought that card and it describes almost everything that I can tell about my dad.

On the card, there is this picture of a father, sitting in his car, and around that picture, there are 10p.m., 11p.m., 12 p.m., then "you are always there for me". Yup, He always be there for me. =")


People hate waiting, at least I do, but my dad always wait for me, when I am on my way home. When I studied in Malaysia, most of the time I took ferry home, the timing was always off, so I can only called home when the ferry was about to depart. Always, it arrived late at the destination, or the luggage officer gave me trouble. After I passed the busy and loud crowd, I will start to search for him, guess what? He was there already!

There was this one time, it was drizzling and it took so long before the custom officer gave my passport back (Yup, in the ferry, the officer holds on to your passport, then return a stampped passport to you when you arrive). I just stepped out the ferry, I could already see him, with his hair wet, smiling to me. I could still remember, how he must saw the ferry arrived and starting searching for me. under the rain.

Now, I am in Singapore, sometime, he can't pick me up in the airport, so my sister or my aunty will. Then, I normally take train home. Early this year, I was back home for Chinese New Year, my flight arrived around 9p.m., so I take 10 p.m. train. When I reached my hometown, it's already 2a.m., again, he is there waiting.

This kind of feeling, the feeling that there always someone be there for you, I will never trade it for anything else.

Love you dad~


To all daddy in the world, Happy Daddy's Day!

Fair?!

He is fifteen, but he looks like 9 years old.

He speaks like a normal kid, but you can tell that he is a kid with down syndorme.

He is an unfortunate kid in some ways, but he is fortunate for being love.

I felt touched, I felt he deserves something better, most of all, I am happy for him.

In my neighbourhood, I saw a kid grows up with a down syndrome. They all look the same. This kid might be a bit 'naughty', but now, when I am home, I saw him 'working', earning his own money, in a small stall in the wet market.

I thought that is Great! With all the limitations, he is at least employed and his employer loves him because he is hardworking. Think about it, if I were to compare with people I know, where they live in abundance, depending on parents mostly, make them feel there is no urgency to do their best (or even complain about the small LITTLE 'crappy' things in their life) I feel disgusted.

I thought life, at the end, is always fair! Just try to look everything from different angle. Sometimes, might be a bit hard, but it's worth the try, at least for me. Like how we always use 'but' after a positive statement, we can do the same whenever we start with a negative statement. The first is about complaining, the latter is about being more open-hearted for any differences in life (It's not unfair, It's just different).

P.S. I know most people do not believe that there is what so called as "Fair". Proven! I had difficulty in searching for a picture for this post. Gosh~

...

I have finally used up all the training session with my personal trainer. During the 6 sessions with him, I found out good things about having a personal trainer:

1. I make the appointment with him, I ought to come. No skipping class.

2. When things are harder for me to lift, he will be there helping. Imagine if I were alone, i will just move on to the next 'easier' machine. =P

3. Of course, he is there to show you the proper way to use the machines. I have learnt and from now on, I will be on my own.

Anyway, will try to keep the regular 3 days working out in the gym. Always feel happy whenever I walk out the gym, it's just a bit difficult to get myself in there, sometimes. =P

New update is that I have a roommate now. My friend is looking for a job, so she is staying with me now. I have been living alone by myself for 8 months. I have no issue with sharing a room with other, as I always did for at least the last 20 years, with my sister, with my cousin, and with my friends. However, I must admit that I prefer to have the room all by myself. I can do whatever I want: making a phone call freely, sleep with light off, cry when I feel to and of course a quite space that anybody would need from time to time, whether you realize it or not!

Sound selfish, huh? That's the truth, so forgive me~

Lately, I hate myself for being too 'cruel' to others (some say), and also too considerate about others which at the end I found out that I have been inconsiderate to myself.

Anyway, for those who are still looking for a job (in Singapore or Indonesia) all the best! Please put in your best effort!

Exhaustedly, love you all~