Henki & Linda's Second Quarter of 2017

It's 10:56 and I have done cooking a dish for tonight, It's the Bak Kut Teh. I have also got paper marked and lunch prepared. What a productive morning. =D

Today woke up early, as Henki has officially starting his "budgeting" months, it's gonna be crazy for him for the next two to three months. Hang on, Baby! This too will pass, it always does. a minute at a time, an hour at a time, then one day at a time.

So, although I have not been writing much on this blog, the least that I could do is to keep up the quarterly "report".

Can you believe that half of 2017 is GONE! What have we used it for all this while?

 

Work
For me, the 3 months since April, nothing has happened much, as usual. My ex-colleague and now-friend had moved to Bali with her husband and her 2 year old boy. And as she finds things to "do" in Bali, we agree to start something small. If everything goes smoothly, we will start somewhere in August or September. It is something for kids, I am going back to where I started (not a bad thing). I thought I have lost the passion towards it, as I do research and read more and imagine how it will be, I actually got excited. Is it really my passion or is it just my character that got easily "excited and passionate" about almost anything that I am thrown at. Anyway, whatever it is that's just me doing the best that I can.

Company training is still on going now, the classes have gone quite well, I think. I have a bit of downtime towards the end of June as it was Lebaran and Bali is packed with people who are travelling from Java island and also it's the Australian school break. Thus, the island is crowded, so do the hotels and restaurants. And because they are understaff, the class is postponed and there I have my break.

Last month I have quit teaching the college students for various reasons, and the major one is that so that I can make time to focus on something else.

I also signed a very short contract to help a spa centre in Bali monitoring their listings on Chinese websites. Something that I can do from home, in between cooking and cleaning the house. It is only a 4 months contract, as I requested, to see if I am still into this thing. It's been almost a month. I am still  hanging on despite the very irritating issue in "accessing" the Chinese website from Indonesia as well as a bit of company politics that they share with me, that if I am given an option care not to know.

Henki's work is FOREVER busy. He is under staff. He is in charge in Sales and Marketing but he is basically the Revenue Director too. That's the problem with big company, they exploit their worker to save cost (or whatever reason they have), demands a lot and giving so little. If we were ever be a business owner (finger cross), I hope we can be a better version of "leader". *Fingercrossed. Oh yeah, I am very hopeful.

Play/Food
We don't play much. >.< However, we enjoyed one another companion most of the time. There are times that we got bored too, of course, but many-many times we don't.

Within three months we only made it once to the beach. There I lost my dearest goggles and hit quite hard by the wave. Thus, due to much rest that Henki needs after all the hardwork during the weekdays, our play is normally food. =D

There are a few memorable weekend "culinary" experience that we had. One of them is at the Tony Roma's. I intended to write about it but find no time til now. The food is excellent, no doubt, considering the price. Hahaha.. What impressed us that night is that how "passionate" the staff seems like. It was someone birthday, so I guessed the girlfriend ordered a cake, the staff, 6-8 of them came out singing the birthday song, NOT the classic birthday song, where before the song ends, the singers' voice normally getting softer and softer. Hahaha. This is their version. I can't remember the tune, but I remember the feeling that I got from that song. It's very jolly! Then, it is not only one song, before the cake "reached" the table, there was another song. And what best is that the staff wasn't only singing, but some of them are playing a simple music instruments to accompany that song too...

And that's not the only best, a staff came out with Polaroid camera and took a picture of the couple with the cake and gave them the picture. And still, that's not it, another staff came out with a deck of card and entertained the couple n their table with simple magic trick. Imagine that! If you are not anti-social, I think you will find this experience memorable.

What impress us is not the 'entertainment', but how Tony Roma's manage to hire those staff that are very skillful and talented and passionate. That's just great!

Bad Month for anything Electronic
This month was bad for our phones (both of our iPhone got into the water). Mine still functions without any "treatment", Henki's dead, so he got it fixed. Then, my laptop started to make so much sound, but still functions well. So I am backing up files on Google Drive and Henki's laptop so that whenever it is dead on me, I am ready for it. *Finger crossed. Then, the car has broken down a few times. The car was "healthy" until we decided to get it "maintained" in an independent automobile repair shop. But after the maintenance, the car broke down 3-4 times before we called the Kia service center and get the necessary fixed. The car functions well now. Ahh.. these things really get me at times. However, as all things, these too will pass. :)

Life in General
The past three months was great. Oh yeah, End of April I was down for about a week with dengue fever, but I have recovered from it. Voila! Other than that, both of us have been quite healthy and happy. I hope I speak for him too =D

Someone said to me "You look so happy in Bali". I said "I can choose to complain about all things that are not going well, things that I am disappointing at, things that I wish for and don't get and dwell in all those negativity, but I won't. I choose another way of living, to be happy."

Of course, at times I "slip" and feel miserable too, but I don't let it get too far, too long, because it doesn't do me any good. So why continue to "slip" right?

加油
Love,
Lin ^ ^

 

It's not unexpected, It's Uncertainty

This month has been full with surprising news. The latest was the news I received when I was teaching my last class in Mediterannean college. Last week, I heard one of my student had an accident. It was quite fatal, he was in coma for a week, til I asked today, how he was doing, his friends said that he had passed last Thursday.

He was only 20 and now he was gone. I believe he attended this school and considering the major he was in (food production), he may have a dream to become a cook, to work in a cruise line and travel the world one day. One decent kid, he is! And just in a blink of eyes, he was gone. May he rest in Peace.

Last two weeks, my good friend's father has just passed too. He was diagnosed from a terminal cancer exactly one month before he passed. Doctor gave him 3 - 6 months, and again, just like that he was gone in a month. 叔叔，安息吧

I might not be close to them, but I feel for them somehow. To that kid, I taught him, advised him to get a pair of glasses to help his eyesight, the last conversation I had with him was he sat beside me in instructor room and remind me his name when I forgot. He was in relationship with his classmate, it broke my heart when I saw her puffy eyes and making sentence like "I am waiting for you" in Chinese during my last class with them. To my friend's dad, he seems to be a traditional dad, his kids (my friend and her siblings) grow up well as a person, and for me it reflects their parents and one one them is him.

These things make me realize how temporary life is. When it is your time, then it is your time. You have no time to regret things that you had done and the things that you wish you have done. So, give your very best in every single things that you are doing. You may have no time to say "I love you" to people that matters, so say it often. You may have no time to say "sorry" to people that deserve them, so say it when you still can.

Things might appear to be unexpected at first, but thinking about it, it's just part of the "uncertainty", one of the most certain things in life!

May we all are blessed with a Peaceful Life.

About doing what matters

Things have been going crazy in the country. I can't say it is totally bad, yet, it is bad, but again as in Yin and Yang, there is always a little good in bad things and a little bad in good things. This applies for human too. We will not see one perfect human who is all good  and we will not see one broken human who is all bad. At times it is the way we react to it that determines something.

Not only in Indonesia, things have been going crazy too for me. I have many broken electronic! I planned to fix my camera, It is a Canon, it still functions just fine, however the rotating screen doesn't displaying the picture clearly as it should be. With that, I cannot see whether a shot is good enough, whether anyone's eyes are closed, and so on. Before I have the time to get it done, my iPhone was broken, it got into a pool of water and was there overnight, and that affects the life of the battery and it got "hot" so easily. Surprisingly, it can still function as it should be, to call, to chat, etc. Then, the car which is perfectly fine, was sent to the repair shop to get some "maintenance" service done. I don't know what they have done, it somehow creates problems. One day, it wouldn't start, then after they fixed that, apparently the next day I notice that the headlight went out, then I have to get them to repair that too, then they did some "operation" to the car, and didn't fix the problem, I drove out with nothing fixed but extra problems, the radiator got so HOT and blew up and smoke came out, scared me to death. Then I had to leave the car there, and a few days after we picked it up, I notice many things in the dashboard (esp, the speedometer) were not right. I definitely not going back there. Oh yeah, other than what happens to me, Henki's phone was also died on him when he had a company photoshoot by the beach, as the ocean decided to give his phone a "bath". How many more devices that can get broken in our house? Have I mentioned that my 3 year old laptop like to shut down by itself? Anticipating anything bad from happening, I have backed up everything important.

That's enough about the trouble that we face and the country is facing.

It is about doing what matters now.

Reading and listening to Ajahn Brahm (again? YUP), I realize there is no use getting so nervous when I got into the car, afraid that it might fail me in the middle of the road, or about when will my laptop decide to "shut down" and never to be able be restarted again? I decide to just go with it until I know what to do best.

Same for the country, Politics as usual is dirty. Now, how about us thinking about what can be done to fix that? Many people want to be somebody and start spreading the words of hate, in the name of their God. A sentence can be interpret differently depending on the understanding of the person who read it, the mood of the person who read it, and lastly the intention of the person who read it.

Teaching the Mandarin class, I told my student you can ask your guests to wait for a while with the following sentence "please wait for a while", however, make sure that you say it gently and politely. You can make that words sound rude, by adding negative emotion when you are uttering those 5 words. That's only a 5 words sentence, imagine a thick holy book with zillions of words in it!

There is a Buddhist teaching that is very profound, it said "Learn from Everyone, Follow no One". Even in spreading his teaching the Gautama never asked the followers to just follow, he wanted them to think for themselves about things that he preached and decide themselves whether it is true or not. They/We all have that right and we are expected to exercise that. Don't follow blindly. We can definitely learn from everyone, I can even learn from the people whom I will try very hard NOT to become. In this case, if people are just better educated, things might turn out as it is.

Thousands of candles have been lighted to show people's support to something/someone, people rallies to show they disagreement about decision that had been made, even my students (at their age, I was still enjoying college and didn't bother about politics that much. Maybe because I wasn't in Indonesia at that time?) were so busy following the news and neglected classes that are going on. For this I wonder, will we make any changes with this?

Personally, I would like to look forward. I was thinking instead of busy following the news, why don't my students put more effort in the class (I know it is not the only place to learn), and better themselves as individual, so that one day they can do things that actually matter. News on the internet is always there, you can do it later, right? Also, parents paid a lot for them to have the opportunity to go to this "college", why don't they fully utilize this privilege? Isn't that one of the way to cultivate the good morale in oneself, what known as "appreciation"? Smaller scale to appreciate the effort of their parents, larger scale, to appreciate the work done by leaders in the society whom have tried very best to serve their people.

Also, I notice, those who don't have the habit to "appreciate", are easily intimidated by those in power. Take my students as example, they despise the management of the college, as there are many policies made are never in the benefit of their students. The school thinks that they have power over the students, they think they can dictate the students to do what they want them to do. So students take their "fate" as it is. In this case, they will "bow down" to the "unfair" management and then... express their frustration in "bullying" those who can be bullied, like the good staff and instructors. This is a very sad fact that happens everywhere where the "bullied" are bullying someone else weaker. Is that right? NO! The right thing is to stand up to what is right, to go up the chain and confront the bullies who had bullied them.

I am a very stiff individual, most of the time, I like things by the book. For I think I will try my very best so that others won't easily find fault in me. I know that it is always so easy to find fault in anything/ any situation if you look hard enough, however, do realize that we can also find beauty in any situation if we try harder.

Going forward, I will still be doing things that I know best. I want to share my passion, my experience and my little bit of knowledge about things that I know, hoping that it will have positive impact to at least ONE other individual and also to learn from ALL about the things that I don't know. I trust that what is right will always be right. Someone I respect said "Don't worry, Karma will get the Bastard." Oops...


Peace,
Lin ^ ^

P.S. About religion, your religion is not better than mine, however you can be better than me and that makes your religion good.

Legal!

Last Weekend, 30 April 2017, we woke up early in the morning (this is something extraordinary for me, especially during the weekend which I would not normally be woken up by the sound of alarm clock), and got ready to sign our paper. What Paper?

It's been 15 months since our wedding ceremony and reception in Medan and 13 months since our wedding reception in Jakarta, and you won't believe that we are still talking about our wedding now. Yep, it's our marriage certificate! After living in worry that we are going to get raids and be jailed for living together without a proper documentation of marriage (I am just kidding about the worry, but being jailed for cohabitating is real in Indonesia, there is a law about it), we are finally get our documentation done.

The question is why so late?

Here is my side of story. Marriage certification is not difficult to obtain in “normal” circumstances, it is easy and it is free now. Normal here means that you are marrying someone opposite sex or someone who have the same religion as you. By this definition, people who would like to have a family with those who are not the same faith are considered “abnormal” in our beloved country. Again, in normal circumstances, we just have to run here and there (RT, RW, Department of Civil Registration or locally known as Catatan sipil). to complete the documents needed before proceeding to the real deal in signing the marriage certificate.

My parents helped me getting my documentation done, such as declaration that I am still single by 3 level of officials back in my hometown, lots of waiting and queuing just to wait someone in charge to sign the paper, because they are busy, with nothing normally. As for Henki, he had to do it himself, so the only time that we have is during our trip back to Jakarta early this year for Chinese new year. Anyway, we got that done too.

Now, why don't we process our marriage certificate in Jakarta? Oh, because the country has passed the law that states that interfaith marriage is not allowed in Indonesia. WHY? Don't ask me. This is the most ridiculous thing ever. Many strong believers of a religion believes that interfaith marriage is not going to work. The reason is that every marriage will encounter difficult times, and in those difficult times, we normally will turn to our faith more than ever. Therefore, if a couple has different faith and belief, how can they resolve their issues together with the guidance of God? How can they go to the same temple/church/mosque and seek the guidance of the "holy" people in there to help them see things clearer and work their problems out?

Initially, I was hesitant to convert because certain things in other religion do not fit into my principles in life and I am quite happy with my current belief. However, with time, my belief told me that it doesn't matter what the paper said about me, but it rather how I feel about myself, that truly matters. With that and my parents' support (Amazing, aren't they?) I don't mind converting, if needed.

Government should note, I convert not because I want, but because I need to or I must. Consider the difference and revisit the relevant law, will you?

In order to be able to process legal documentation that certified us as husband and wife, we need to go through something called "wedding based on faith/religion" or known as Nikah Agama, which is our problem. To put it blankly, There is almost no church wants me because I am not a believer. And we can't get it done in a temple, because Henki doesn't want to hold an incense because he needs to maintain certain belief of his and to save him from explaining things to people that need explanation. Story short, "Almost" is the keyword, at the end, we are able to get the church to issue a paper before going to the next step of signing the final marriage certificate in the relevant government office (As for us, we register it under the civil registration office in Bali, not in my hometown nor Henki’s. Living in a BIG country has its own problem, although we are Indonesian, we are not “local” as long as the Balinese government office is concerned). Back to the “help” that we are getting, I am not sure whether it is his interpretation on God's words that makes him want to help couples like me and Henki or it is something more worldly. However, I am grateful that he wants to do it so that we can get on with life and process the next legal paper to certify that we are a family. (I can only see it happens during our next trip back in CNY 2018, if nothing urgent happens before that.)

From the simple Christian ceremony we had last weekend, we have finally had our classical wedding vow. We didn’t prepare it, the pastor helps us with that, promising each other to respect and love one another in good and bad times, in health and sickness, until death do us apart. I want and will hold on to that, even if I am not born Christian. With the blessing, love and support from our family and friends, hopefully we can make it happen.

Anyway, we are legally married now. It doesn't change anything in our relationship, except we have papers to show during raids. Blah~

After a year plus of marriage, we are already a better couple compare to when we started last year. A friend told me that the first year of marriage is the most difficult year. I did experience that last year. Some other couples might not. I am just saying based on my experience. I struggle with new routine in new place, with so little / no other family members around, with Henki's work that is going crazy with every promotion and of course with each others' habits that are easily overlooked during our 3 years plus of LDR before committing into marriage.

I am not saying that we have got everything "under control", because we are not and I have learned that we never will, but I can handle things slightly better than before. Marriage changed me as a person, I believe things have changed Henki too. Believe it or not, my family and friends have helped a lot in straightening some knots for me in difficult time, helping to see things from different perspective and get to understand marriage life better. This part of walk in life has been much relaxing walk because of Ajahn Brahm. I must give him this credit. I listen to his talk a lot and Henki has never prohibit me from doing that (Thank you!) and I will "force" him to admit that he sometimes listen and "enjoy" it too. Enjoy here means find it make sense and he will tell me that "Baby, do you hear that? You have to worry less." He is a much more "Buddhist" than I am. He lets go more easily and it sometimes irritates me. Because I have to do all the worry, although experience has repeatedly showed me that there is no use in worrying.

Our marriage is still “young”, seumur jagung in Bahasa Indonesia, so far problems in life resolved not because we visit the temple/church often, but because I want to make it work and Henki does too. Both of us have to let go a little bit of our ownwelf and learn to accept others as they are and help each others in difficult times. I also learned from something that I read/watch that sometimes in marriage it is good to be “deaf” as most of the time when tiredness and irritation set it, people said things that they do not mean, and lots of times, it is destructive. So, be deaf at times.

Ending this post, I want to express my disagreement about the law that prohibits the interfaith marriage in Indonesia, because it certainly doesn’t help anyone and doesn’t improve anything AT ALL. It plants the seed in people’s head about how differences can’t live together. Some will argue, it will be confusing for the kids if their parents are not the same religion, how do the children should be brought up, in Buddhist way or the Christian way? NONE. Children should be brought up KIND, LOVING, RESPECTFUL and UNDERSTANDING. Lastly, once you brought them up that way, hopefully we are also given the strength to love and trust them in making their choices in life, just like how our parents do for us.

Legal,

Lin ^ ^

Henki & Linda's first quarter of 2017

Can you believe that we have almost passed the first quarter of 2017? Time flies!

Here is an update of what's happening, nothing much but everything is good.

The first month, we did a trip back to visit both sides of the families in Jakarta and in Medan. We manage to get some paper done as well for Henki in Jakarta. Then, Henki stayed about a week in Medan before flying back to Bali to catch another flight the next day to India, Business Trip. I stayed back as planned for another week and happy to be home. They are still the best! I miss them now as I am writing this. But, I gain soooo much weight. Still trying to shed some more now.

The second month, February, Henki came back from India with a fever. Even with the fever he still went to work and half day after that I had to pick him up and sent him to the hospital. He was admitted for 4 days before coming back home and start working again. And a few days later, I was having fever (scared me to death, I just don't want to relive whatever happened at the end of last year), lucky with some rest I got better in 2 days and fully recover after a week or so. I was just too exhausted running here and there when Henki was hospitalized. But we are fine now :)

This month, March, for the first time since June last year, we got into the Ocean again, Henki as usual enjoying his time swimming far away from the shore, as for me playing by the beach side. I love the beach, I am not afraid to get dark, but I am scared too at the same time, as I always think that I am not good in threading water, thus.. fear has won over me there.

As for work, This month I have full attendance in each training group that I did. That means I am healthy. Yay! I am negotiating new contract too, hopefully get it done by early or mid next month. Finger-crossed!

Henki's work is terrible. I can easily say he dedicates a total of 60 hours per week for work. Although I can see in his frustration about so much things to do and the lack of human resource, I think he enjoys his current role in sales and marketing. He told me that he is more confidence and not hesitate to meet with people and get some deals done. Again in between his frustration dealing and managing the human within, he also enjoys dealing with some business partners and customers. I am so proud of him.

Oh yeah, something small and not important, finding things to do, I just started another Instagram account (@goingplaces_101) that features all the beautiful places that I had been and those places that I will be. Digging out old photos, gosh, it brings so much good memory back.

This year, I am anticipating 4 things as of now; getting our marriage cert done (Oops! Long story), friends visit in Sept 2017, our Japan trip in Dec, and lastly have dad and mom here in Bali again, still planning for a good time.

This morning we had a 6,4 magnitude earthquake shaking right underneath this small island. Fortunately, there is no serious casualty. I would like to thank family and friends who call me to check on me and Henki. We are fine. Bali is fine.

Peace,

Linda :)

Wrapping 2016 with Gratitude

 

Time passes real quick. It feels like yesterday when I was still in my parents' home busy preparing for our wedding early this year, then moving city and in 3 days, the year of 2016 is ending.

 

As usual, wrapping each year, let's look back and see how we have grown and start another year bringing a better person and forgiving a less "good" quality behind.

 

This year is definitely an important year for me. There are many changes in life since I got married. Early this year, I wrote about 2015 in a glimpse but didn't make any personal resolution for this year, because I honestly haven't figured out things for myself since I got married. It is no longer about me, it is more about "us" (Henki & I), as Ajahn Brahm said and supported by Mom and Dad.

 

Moving to Bali is a bitter sweet experience. I am super close with my family and relatives back in Medan. The bitter part is that I am now quite far from them (I joke that Medan - Bali flight is like flying to China, it takes almost a whole day), and I miss spending weekends afternoon, playing, catching up with my sis, niece, nephew and cousins. The sweet part is that I am here in one of the heavens on earth with my other half now, sleeping better, and playing harder. Also, living further from family makes me realized how I love and I am loved by my family back home. Early this month when my dad and mom made their visit to Bali, my grandma and aunties were buying me lots of good food from Medan. Everybody was busy shopping and preparing cooked food for me and Henki. Honestly, whose relatives are still doing that??? I am blessed to be raised in this family, aren't I?

 

About Married Life

 

Being married is not the end of a "happy" story. It is just the beginning of living LIFE in a more humane way in general. It is building a family after all. Some people asked me when I am planning to start a family, referring to "having a baby". Deep in side, I tell myself that I am already starting a family, by being married.

 

Being married, I learn about so many things, I think it is the same for Henki too.

 

We have to make lots of adjustment in our life and learning (yup! still learning) to accept one another. It is putting 2 different individuals and hope they are walking towards the same destination after all. First year of marriage is not really a honeymoon period, it is a learning period (a continuous one, in fact!). Lots of respect, patience, tolerance, forgiveness (at times) and of course the "never-give-up" attitude are needed to make things work. Those things are not cliché. Those things are REAL! You have seen lots of our happy moments captured on camera, you just didn't see those nights sleeping back to back, trying hard not to touch one another. I am glad we made it through those nights, reconcile and get a better understanding (hopefully) about one another. 

 

I am proud to say that we do start this family as those in the olden days did. We experienced those shopping for household items and making a place HOME with our hard earned/saved  money, not asking from anybody else. We started from the kitchenware, dining table, bed and lastly an old secondhand car for practical purpose. Looking back, there are some "soury" feeling to not being able to buy the things that we "want", because we want to save it for something more important and matter, but most of the feeling is Pride!

 

In this case, I really look up to some family and friends who can actually afford luxurious things, but choose a simpler way of living a life, with a super generous heart to those in need and things that really matter. They are my other role models (other than my parents). I learn from them not trying so hard to impress others with what we have, but instead of what we are as a person. This life value is easier for me to practice, because I grew up in a small town where people are more sincere, although not all, than those in bigger metropolitan city. From this, I learn too not to be impressed easily by people who talk big about what they can do and what they have, because most of the time, we can see through them. 

 

From here, I learn what kind of family that we want to build and what not. If lucky to have any, what kind of values that I want to teach my children in the future. Things are not always as comfortable as what some of other newly weds have, but dad and mom started simple too and if they make it works to date, I hope Henki and I can too. I hope we started right. Bless us!

 

Carreer & Work

 

One of the biggest adjustments that I have to make is in term of work. I tried a full time job as a school teacher, teaching Mandarin. It didn't work out well for me, as I am not 100% satisfy with my working environment, so I quit. On top of that, Henki had to sacrifice his resting time (due to my early work schedule) and work longer hour. Exhausting for him. Although he didn't complain. Thanks for those one full month, Baby!

After that, I applied for a part time job, and was having the power to bargain for work schedule as much as I think I want/am capable to handle, by giving house chores, my family, as my first priority.

 

I know it might sound silly to some others, but growing up one of the most important things that MIGHT contribute to how Dad and Mom turn out to be, for me, successful parents is that they keep those values that we youngsters deem as outdated now. For example, always making the time to eat, at least, dinner in one table together, how mom no matter how busy she was with the shop, she had never neglected the needs of her children. We are always her first priority, we had always had breakfast before we go to school, she prepared our snack to be taken to school, lunch has always ready when we got home. Those motherly chores might seem 理所当然 as Chinese put it or "as it should be by right", but those things are the things that we appreciate the most now as their children.

 

Those 'outdated' things are the things that I want to keep in my own family with Henki. Just during the visit, my dad told me (he is not a kind of dad who will sit me down and tell me all kind of life lessons, but he did this time), to prepare a glass of water when your husband is home after a long day of work. A more 'modern' part of me will tell myself that is the thing that he can do on his own, but there might be certain things that need not modernization, thus, I try my best to do as dad and mom told /showed me on how to be a good wife, hoping that my current family will work out like how Dad and Mom build their home. A home where I am very proud of and can't stop to brag about!

 

So, for now, work with the sole purpose to earn is a less important thing. I work to fill up my time and to keep continue doing things that I am passionate with. However, tell you the truth some part of me do fear that my value as a person is lessen because I am not able to support myself, to shop without feeling guilty and other petty negative feelings about being too depending on someone else.  That's my sacrifice. I hope it will be worth it, as they said.

 

That's mostly about my "work", not so much a career.

 

There are more to Henki's career though.  I know only certain parts of it, but I do know he works his "b*tt" of this year. He has his heart full at work when he is at work, and sometimes even when he is home from work.

 

He does make progress in term of career advancement, and I am a proud wife. Don't argue with me, I am a true believer that hard work always pays off, one way or another.

 

He decided to take a new role in his company this year, to be out of his comfort zone, from Revenue to Sales & Marketing, and I think he does well that he was trusted with a new property to handle, starting the very end of this year.

 

I don't know much about what's going on EXACTLY in his daily work life at the office, but I hope that he will learn to take care of himself better, after the 110% that he had put in at work.

 

"What's done is finish", said Ajahn Brahm

 

I kind of understand how he felt about "unfinished" work, but work will never finish, there are always things to do, if you do not want to stop at just being good or enough, things can always be better. However, that's a worry for another day. At the end of the day, our body is the only things that stay with us (yup! even people we love/love you, will leave us one day, hopefully not by choice), so better take a good care of our body, when we can.

 

I just want to let him know that he has done super good here!

 

Others...

This year is not a good year for me physically. I was coughing for almost 4 months and just got better about 2 weeks ago. I went for a consultation and being diagnosed with bronchitis and pneumonia (caused by bacteria called Pseudomonas Aeruginosa) and were hospitalized for almost 2 weeks. during the hospitalization period, I had measles and was isolated. After being discharged, I was still on antibiotic (lots of them) and not getting better until I stopped the intake of the drugs given and went for a second opinion in Singapore, just to be told that there might be wrong diagnosis and I am young and healthy. It might be just my body recovering slowly and for sure, the side effect of a month of antibiotic. 

 

Relief is the biggest feeling that I have, because I have been worried sick about the things that I was told that I had in my body (even search for the "mortality rate" for that disease, yes! I was feeling that terrible that it felt like dying). However, to think about all the stress that experience had put me through, I do feel disappointed at the medical care standard in Indonesia. There was a point that I was asked to go for HIV test to eliminate some aspects that might causes my compromised immune system (Is it even really compromised? Who knows!) It came out negative, but that was one stressful afternoon. My mom was tearing and kissing me in relief when she and Dad accompanied me to the hospital to take the result.

 

What an experience. I am glad that it had passed. During that terrible period, I realized something, that the most scary part about dying is when you think how people who love you might grieving so much that it breaks your heart and it is your fault to put them through that path of suffering. That is the scariest part that I felt, not the fear about dying itself, not the fear about not achieving anything, there was even slight relief that you do not have to be worry about anything worldly anymore, that you have done your best. Anyway, that's just sick body and mind talking.

 

As the doctor in Singapore told me "You are young and healthy." Let's just hang on to that for now :)

 

Henki is generally healthy, there was a few times that he was down because he was too tired, one of those times was when he was taking care of me. I just hope that he will commit to saying goodbye to the "da*n" cigarette very very soon! Oh yeah, I hate cigarette, soooooo much. I am super sensitive to it, in a bad way, I can even smell someone was smoking outside of my frontdoor while I sit here, typing.

 

Moving on, we didn't travel much this year. Henki made a trip to Kuala Lumpur for Work, We made a trip to Singapore for medical care (which turn to short getaway that Henki didn't enjoy much, very difficult man to satisfy, poor him :p), and short trip to Bandung last March. That was pretty much it.

 

 

We had never planned for any honeymoon trip and didn't have any. To comfort myself, I told myself that I am living in Bali, where newly wed came to have their honeymoon. How smart! =D Based on this logic, we have our honeymoon every other weekends for about 3 months early this year, adventuring around Bali. Lots of beach hopping, until earthquake stroke last June/July. 

 

Reading is poorly maintained this year. :( Writing, I have been writing lots of posts that are related to learning mandarin this year, but nothing much personal, 15 posts, including this one, in a year time. Cooking, I learn to cook, and I think (I hope Henki agrees with me =D) that it gets better with time. Slow progress and depending so much on the mood, but I think am slightly better, comparing to the beginning of this year. I know how coriander looks like now, how does "leek" and "lemongrass" look like and how to differentiate the two and many other simple things around the kitchen. In between, lots of hours of phone call were made to mom as my lifeline. Oh yeah, I am that stupid before, slightly smarter now. =D That's the most important thing about life, isn't it? To learn each and every day. Doesn't matter how small the progress is, as long as we keep moving, that's what matter.

 

This pretty much of our 2016, more of mine and a bit of Henki's.

 

I am grateful for whatever happened in 2016, not limited to all the good moments, but to those period of time when I wasn't well, to those times that we have our arguments, to those stressful time of work. I believe we are going to start 2017 a better person, if not much better, a little.

 

2017's prediction is not good for me, however, I determined to make it good and prove the prediction wrong. If I lose, as always "That too will Pass".

 

May each and everyone of our family and friends have a healthy, blessed, prosperous and happy New Year 2017.

 

Love,

Us (Linda & Henki)

 

About Contentment and 100%-ness

 

知足常乐

“Contentment brings Happiness”

 

It's been a while. Life has been in between busy and peaceful to less drama. So there is nothing extraordinary. But I am grateful that things have been going great. Just missing some people back in Medan.

So, here is something that I would like to jot down for myself to read one day.

I have been coughing for about a month plus, so far it is the second longest track record of coughing that I have had. The first still the one I had when I was in Beijing, due to polluted air. Now, it is the same case. However, since I can't sleep well at night because of the cough and I am done playing doctor for myself I dragged myself to the doctor (OH yeah... No one else can drag me and force me to do it.)

The result after the examination is rather as expected. Of course, I am going in with a cough and I am coming out with a cough medicine, on top of that, I am being prescribed with antihistamine called: Alergine cetirizine. Just hope that it clears the itchiness in the throat.

That's not the thing that I would like to remind myself (Although, it might come handy one day).

It is about life in general.

I thought I use my time really well lately. I teach and enjoy the current classes that I am handling and just considering another training for hotel, and around the house, surprisingly I still manage to do the house chores really well. For both work outside and inside, I got a good weekend off. On top of the regular cooking for dinner, I successfully copied the recipe of donut and martabak (4 times) that I found on Instagram. Somebody else is liking it and I am proud. =D For my family, they know, when I was in high school, I don't even dare to touch the stove. During college time, a male flat-mate taught me how to make fried rice. Now, I am cooking for another human being, not super good, but things get better with time. You tell me how can I not proud of that? Often times, we just have to impress ourselves, not others! =D

However, among those activities that have kept me quite exhausted by the end of the day and always happy when it comes to adventurous or even super lazy weekend, I got bored sometimes. I always think that I can do more with what I have. I got excited whenever my partner comes home and discuss his work with me at home. Although I can't help much, the discussion gets my brain going. Especially now that he has already moved to S&M department, more things that I can relate to. I am grateful of him for doing that to me. In that process, there is a certain part of me that always think that I can do more than what I am already doing right now. I am better than what I am right now. Maybe that's true and maybe that's not.

However, my interaction with a doctor today made me learn to be more content. Since I choose teaching Mandarin as something I would like to do (I got an offer to go back to Hospitality industry because as the Chinese market is growing here in Bali, the human resource for that market is insufficient. I decline it because I know I am not cut for a big corporation, too much politics at all levels, my greatest weakness), I might as well give my 100% in doing things that I do. In my life, I have always had done the same. In teaching, some people here told me to lower my expectation and just do enough because we don't expect people here to be as good as the Medanese in term of picking up Chinese language. Lucky that I am stubborn. I do lower my expectation, by slowing down the pace that I teach and the amount of material that I give, but never my view towards my students. Do just enough is not something I would like to do. I like to do my best, because I believe that certain people will be benefited from my effort. What is the greatest satisfaction than seeing our effort paid off, right? I see some students get interested in Chinese and looking forward to the class and actually can start forming sentences with whatever they 'catch' for the past 2,5 months.

Today, just before I went to the doctor, I was teaching my playgroup class. Children in playgroup are not expected to recognize characters yet. However, I believe if we can make it fun, why not. Just now, out of nowhere a 4 year old kid who had just started learning Mandarin (and whose mother tongue is no where close to Chinese language) is reading the Chinese characters to me and know what they mean! To be fair , that kid is naughtily smart. However, if from the beginning I have decided to go with the culture here to give just enough, just go by the textbook (which sucks), it might not happen. No one will enjoy the benefit to know that Chinese can be fun, and I will never get to feel proud, excited and happy, like what I am feeling now. I am so proud of her!!! Ecstatic!!!

Going back to the doctor, the doctor asked me if my work require me to be out a lot and asked what I do for a living. When I told her what I did, she gets so excited to know more about Mandarin and she makes me feel that I have got an exciting life teaching Mandarin. While most of us (including me) think that doctor is a profession that is not everyone who wants to be, can be. Because of the requirement of the brain 'capacity', which I believe I don't have. Also, things that they do are so 'technical' (I don't even know the word to describe it), that I think it is something prestigious.

However, seeing her eyes lighted up discussing Mandarin with me (the light that I don't see when I first walked in and when we discussed about my cough. To think about it, maybe Chinese language is more interesting than my cough. haha), it reminds me to be just grateful, content and give my 100% in everything that I do now and every opportunity that knocks.

For all of us who find that we are stuck and want to do just more of many OTHER things, because we are bored, ask ourselves if we have given our 100% in the moment, in things we do, to people around us and to improve what we are doing right now. Then, we might know what to do next.

As for me, I would like to be better in Mandarin, MUCH Better. Test can only grade us to a certain level. My HSK 6 certification means nothing to me now, because I know although that is the highest level for foreigners, but I think I still have so MUCH room to improve, sooooo much more.

Love Life,
Lin ^ ^

The person I want to be and NOT want to be

Dealing with certain people make me realize the person I want to be and the person I will try my hardest NOT to be.

This is a reminder to myself. I hope in 10 to 30 years from now, I will look back at this post and hope that I do not stray off course.

I WANT to be a person that always be grateful of the little good things that others have done for me. ALL THE little things, including, accepting the offer to serve me a bowl of soup and I want to always say THANK YOU for those thoughtful act.

I DO NOT WANT to be the person who is unappreciative of the things that others have done for me, even though it maybe not exactly what I want, but if I know that they do it out of good intention, I will accept it with an open heart! Because that what lifts people up! The opposite puts people down and make others not want to do anything else for us. Example: If someone is dying to share their most favorite food with me, I will devour it and for that one time NOT insist on my own preference and put down theirs. We can always have our own "good food" some other time, so much time for that. The fact that others want us to have a taste of their favorite things should be a sign of love and that is priceless. So, Appreciation is the least we can give them in return.

I WANT to be the person who is easy to deal with, like my dad and mom. They are just happy about almost anything that we do for them. It is so easy to buy them gifts, foods, or even take them anywhere. They will use the things that you buy them, they will give the foods that we bought them a try (and decide if it is good or not later on), they will have a good time whenever you take them to. Looking at how our efforts are appreciated makes us want to do more for them.

I DO NOT WANT to be a person who is difficult to deal with. I learn that someone who is picky about food is not a good companion to be with. There is a difference between personal value and being picky. Some of my friends are vegetarian, so we respect their choice of life and we will go to vegetarian restaurant and have a good time together. Come on!!! We have so many other days to enjoy non vegetarian meals! However there are some people whom we take to a good place for Soto or Indonesian yellow soup (that we know they like) and still unable to satisfy them, throwing out comment like "Prawn Soto is not good, chicken and beef Soto are more common" (with the unsatisfied "face"), "I do not like this", "I am always picky." GOSH! ?

I WANT TO communicate kindly to others. When we are happy about something it is easy to praise (although some people still find it difficult to say the kind words and always find a way to put down others, I DO NOT WANT to be that type of person), what more difficult is when we are in disagreement or unhappy about things. However, I have seen people who can manage those kind words even when we know from their face that they just try to be appreciative and do not want to discourage us. Towards these group of people, it always encourages me to do better for them. My dad is a good example. For Conventional Older Chinese Folks, Pizza may not always be their favorite. Given the option, they might prefer those comfort food like Chinese noodle, dumpling, Nasi Padang etc. Once, my sis and I took our parents to the Pizza Restaurant. They finish all the food, no waste, but we can tell that dad is not a fan of Pizza. However, when asked, he will say "It's good." Know him well we asked "Wanton Noodle is better than Pizza, isn't it?" He smiled and nodded. We know what to do next. However, from time to time we always try to share with them the food that we like, such as: Japanese Sushi, Korean food, or whatever available in town. There are times that they can't stop telling us that the food is good and of course it is all over their face and will gladly order much more for them! That is so rewarding.

Most WOMAN do this from time to time; We keep quiet and hope for people around to 'get' the unhappy vibe that we sent out and hoping for others to understand and be emphatic towards us. Most of the time others do not get what we are trying to convey in that "sour-y" face. I learnt this for the past few weeks and find that irritating. Thus, I DO NOT WANT to be that kind of person. I will say what I want and not want, again kindly! However, I really have to be thankful of my partner and family that they have been so patient towards me. I have to thank the person who have shown this irritating behavior ALL the time too. The person has made me realize of WHAT NOT to be.

Lastly, about being thrifty and a penny-pincher. I have seen my mom saves from nothing until she and dad can finally give the family a comfortable life, good education to their children (something they do not have before), and a decent roof above the family's head. I do not understand why she did that before. Growing up, I had lots of want as part of peer pressure. Branded stuff in small kampung is only in the level of "Adidas", "Nike" and friends, never to the extend of "LV", "Chanel" and friends. But at times, although I know we can afford it, my mom still didn't always grant my wish, most of the time the reason is that because I had already had an existing that still works just fine. Now, I know why. It is not about being a penny-pincher, but it is about prioritizing what is important. For them, when it comes to learning, my parents had never said no. I attended Sempoa class, Piano class, Mandarin Class, English Class, Taekwando, and all other classes that our small town can offer. It was always a YES! from them. When they struggle to afford my education (for some it is not much money), they sell their comfortable air-conditioned car to send me to school that give me bigger opportunity to see the world with a much more open minded attitude.

Lastly about being thrifty and being a penny-pincher. For me, "no food go to waste" discipline is not about being a cheapskate. I do it because I think about those people who has nothing to eat. So for me, now that I have something to fill the stomach, I want to be grateful about it, appreciate it. Of course, I do it whenever I can. When I can't, I won't. There was one time, that I left the food that I had cooked and the rat which is up for ANYTHING came and had it tasted before the human did. I have to throw it all away, because I know rats are dirty and I do not want to risk being ill by sharing food with them. However, whenever I cooked more than we need in one meal, it is normally because I can keep it and eat it the next day and I WILL eat it. So, it has nothing to do with being a penny-pincher and I do not appreciate people throwing my food away.

Oh yeah, it is not easy to plan perfectly to avoid food that ends up in the dustbin. But it is much more difficult when you have to keep throwing food away everyday. I would rather put my head into the planning of how much should I cook than being an 'efficient' person that throws food away, because that is EASY!

Please also differentiate people who are being Thrifty and Prudent to those who are a penny-pincher to the extend that know only to take advantage of others.

Oh yeah, I am now careful about spending because I want to create a comfortable life for our little family in the future. But I have never take advantage of others, never want to! I know how hard my partner works super hard and I appreciate it by saving it so that at the end of the year we can travel and enjoy ourselves, by the right time come, we can also to start a family for real comfortably without relying on others. I do not see the need to compete with others let alone impress others and no one can make me do it. I have seen my family and friends who really have something are normally humble and do not boast. And I have seen those who boast actually are empty inside, and they can only fool the fools. Opps! I am not joining the club!

Sorry for the ranting... For the past two weeks, I have been made realize of how I want to be and how I don't want to be as a human being. Phew~

Half A Year

It has been six months since our wedding. We finally do not call ourselves newly wed and he doesn't introduce me as his "new wife", just "wife". =D

People say first 3 months is honeymoon period. For us it is quite true, that's when I just first move to Bali and enjoying my "downtime" with no work (after last few crazy months juggling work and wedding preparation last year), that's when the industry he is working in was in its slow period. So, no pressure in life and it is something that people called as bed full of roses. Then, I started having enough with down time and wanting to get back in action (unfortunately finding the ideal one isn't always easy), and for him, work is starting to get crazy. That's when as individual we were dealing with our own stuff and affect us as an "us". First quarrel in our marriage life had finally taken place, and I am glad that we got through it. At the end of each quarrel, we normally find out the truth isn't always as bad as our assumption that get us into the quarrel mode.

I am learning so much here. I am someone who is impatient. I see unfinished stuff, I will deal with it until it is done. I like to start things and get them finish as fast as possible. I set goals and I would like to achieve it fast. I found that this kind of spirit is good in a way, but has its many drawbacks in many ways. It often drains me, physically. And when someone is tired, you know how they get irritated quickly over the tiniest matters. In marriage life, patience is the best of friend that we have to make. So I am learning.

He is learning too. He has always been a very hardworking man and takes his work seriously. It is what makes me fall in love with him in the first place (we always like people who talk about his work with shining eyes, don't we?), but it has its drawback too. Anxious about doing his job well (especially the new position he is taking on), he has been working 12 hours or more daily and come back home still reading articles to improve his knowledge about this new field he is in. Human is not designed for that long hour kind of work. At one point, that person will crack. I made this known to him, so that he didn't get lost in the process when trying to excel in work. I want him to realize that many other important things to in life. I can see him trying too here.

For me, I can't stress this enough, to the people whom I work with now when they would like me to commit more of my time to work, I make it known that my family comes first now. I want to work and will definitely give my very best in it, as simple as coming home preparing dinner and make the house Home(!) for us. I would like to recreate the family I come from where dinner time is bonding time. Eating out is good, but home cooked food has its own meaning to it. So, this family has my full commitment. However, I know that I cannot do this alone.

All in all, 6 months of marriage it is not always a bed full of roses. However, it is important to count the blessings and make use "the truckload of dung" as Ajahn Brahm calls it, carry it around your pocket and let it stink or use it as a fertilizer.

Here I want to count my blessing in this marriage life.

He has provided me with the liberty to be picky about work I do. I teach only to channel my passion about sharing things that I like and the good news is that I don't have to do it full time. I can use the downtime to write (something I love and rather good at ;p) and who knows where this will lead. Future has been uncertain for me, in term of work, or maybe in all aspect as how life should be, uncertain! :) 

I thank him too for granting all the little things and wishes that I have, the need for beach time, rice field time, spa time and good meal time over the weekend. This might be the biggest little things that I appreciate, the little things.

Lastly, I thank him for being patient with my cooking and hey, I get better with time. =D He used to not eat the strange tasting food I cooked, which at the end I am responsible to finish it), but I think he now learns that for him to eat the most unsavory meal that I prepare means a lot to me. So he eats them now, although I can still tell from his face that he just want to finish that one meal fast. Haha... Okay, I don't like to fail in my experiment in the kitchen too and guilty for serving it. But I can't throw the food away, while many people out there is dying out of hunger. Unless it is something that is very unsalvageable, then no food gets wasted in this house. That's the rule! So, that's great act at his part to bear with it now! (FYI, I serve something good too from time to time, really good ones) =D

However, I hope he learns to wait patiently! He is super bad at these. I don't like to wait too, that's why I get many things done myself rather than waiting for someone to do it. Or at times, when I thing people are just not doing their job and caused delay in the whole process and cause us our time, I will just make my complain heard to the relevant person in charge! No use in getting irritated at yourselves and the situation and worse people around you! However, I know that in life, there will be many things that require us to just wait patiently and nothing else, unavoidable ones, like doctors, queuing in cashier counter, in the restaurant for food, even when accompanying someone to do shopping.  These are the things that are not going to get better. For now, we are waiting to see doctor for ourselves, in the future we are going to wait for a doctor to see one of our family members, and getting sulky about the waiting time, will only make things move a whole lot more slower than it is.

All in all, in our marriage life, both of us need to learn and forgive a lot (the lighter part such as forgiving the unsavory food. haha, the serious one such as the comment we made to each others when we are busy, angry or sick. I think things happen, have seen my parents quarrel, never so bad, but they did and still grow old together happily. So, I hope we can too =D).We too have to learn to understand that things are not always good. It is life, sometimes we are up there and sometime we are down and bruising. I too believe, there is nothing call "time-off" in marriage. Once you take that time off, you are as good as 'fired'. It is like you are leaving a company when it needs you the most. Why does the company have to retain you when you decide to come back only when things get better? They can survive without you in bad times, then they don't need you. Maybe that's the closest analogy (or does it even make any sense?). I am trying to say here it is good that we leave far apart from our relatives. When we quarrel, we have to face each other. We can't run to others to find companies. Third party in a quarrel isn't always good thing. Have witnessed and heard that kind of stories and it doesn't always end well.

I am learning to stop expecting him to do certain things that he is not built up to do, such as receiving a bucket of flowers, candle light dinner or anything that you can expect from a "romantic" man. I have to live with this unromantic man that I married to, that I want to build a family with, and intend to grow old with. The closest thing we do as a couple is buying matching motorbike jacket, that's for practical reason. Blahhh...

Someone said it right I think, that marriage is like filling things (like love, care, forgiveness, kind words, understanding, happiness and many more things) in a box (called home). Sometimes you have to take things out because you need it but you know when you stop putting things in the box and continuously take, the box is going to be empty one day. Simply put: "Give and Take".

We have a long way to go. 6 months is short, we have another 60 yearas ahead of us. =D

 

So Much Love,

Lin ^ ^

The Beauty of Balinese

Those are Huge offerings for Special days

Almost 6 months in Bali, I seem to find something to do that I am satisfied with. I tried school, it didn't work out so well, as I found that no matter how hard I want to try to make things better, I was abided by the system, which unfortunately is good only in theory but not practical.

So, I am now back tutoring again. This time it is tutoring tour guide, Balinese guides. These people do not stop to surprise me in so many (good) ways.

The first is that they speak so many languages, maybe not fluently, but good enough to be able to take the tourists around. That's the confidence and willingness to learn that amaze me. Most of my 'students' speak more than 3 languages, they speak Bahasa Indonesia for sure, Balinese as their dialect and a little English of course, then Russian, Japanese, Korean and now they are learning Mandarin, as Chinese tourists is the growing market here.

They said they get confused sometimes, but they are getting used to it with each passing day. Improvement is what I seek, so I think that's great.

Then, last week, had the chance to chat about the tradition that is still well alive in the society; the Balinese praying ritual. Most Balinese knows 3 calendar systems which I think is more than common and makes it extraordinary (my family is conventional Chinese, we use the Gregorian and Lunar, I know how to read both, but many Chinese, especially the youngsters, feel Lunar calendar is useless, so they do not bother to get to know it more). Again, Balinese knows THREE, the Gregorian, Wuku and Saka.

Because of their "persistency" in keeping what they believe in, thus makes this land special. People who lives here know best that Balinese is very laidback, in a way. Most of them put their belief first than work. Thus, many of them will take a break from work (the chance to earn money and make so called "better" living), and do what they need to do "pray". We who live and work here enjoy the benefit of more holiday :)

After a few months here, I notice that full moon that comes twice every month in either Wuku or Saka Calendar, is the same like the Lunar dating system. For these 2 days each month, Balinese normally will have bigger and more special offerings than the usual daily offering that they made. And much bigger for many other special days.

If you ever stepped into Bali, these offerings are everywhere, in front of the house, on the street, in the intersection, etc. They call this "Canang", if I am not mistaken. It is a small weaved basket with flowers, incense fruits, etc in it.

Other than that, this ibu (my student) was trying to explain to me that in Wuku (that has only 210 days in a year) and Saka calendars combined, there are many other sacred days where they will perform ritual in honoring the good aspects in live or merely give thanks to the nature/things around us. Last week, they just had this Tumpek Landep day, and according to this ibu, other than giving things to "metal" things that has been so great in assisting their lives, making work easy (including cars, bikes, laptops, knives, etc), they also give thanks to trees that deliver fruits, corps, etc, they give thanks to animals too, and many more. Each day has its own name.

From my conversation with Balinese, thus working class level, including Grab drivers (Yeah, I use their service a lot and often satisfied), they acknowledged that they spend a lot of money on offerings, that include the "basket", flowers, joss stick and fruits (the biggest amount was spent on fruits), but they think it is something they are willing to do and must do to get that peace of mind, for themselves, for the family, for the community and for this goddess land.

I am quoting what the ibu said to me in regard to that matter: "This is something that we do from our heart. We want to do it. Foreigners, the non-native, may say things about what we do, and take it for granted. They sometimes asked why this land is so peaceful, but they never think that it is what the people do that contributes in maintaining the peace in the land. We, Balinese, believe what we do gives peace in this land."

That statement really hits me. And I believe and I wish they will continue to do so. I know that part of the belief has contributes in keeping the land beautiful (like keeping the building low, not taller than the coconut trees), but I never think about the peace. To think about it now, I have so much respect for them now.

I am not a super religious person. However, I can see how this belief goes well with the universe and among us as a 'humankind'. Again, Respect!

This is Bali at its finest. The essence of Bali is not in the luxurious beach club nor the night life, but in the beauty of its people. Most of these people respects nature, I don't get whistling when I walk around alone, when I get it, I know it is not from the Balinese, but rather people who come from another islands of Indonesia.

Coming from a city that is not always very safe, I was skeptical at first, when my partner left our belongings (in a plastic bag) or jackets or helmets hanging on our bike, while we shop for groceries (it can take an hour at least). I expect to comeback and found something missing, but so far, this place has never let me down yet. I am so glad about it.

If you ever read or hear a story when bad things happen during a night out in Bali, which happened to me too. Don't blame this place, don't blame the Balinese. Blame yourselves. I blame myself for putting myself in a place where I know no good things can ever happen. If you ask me "is it okay?" Of course it is NOT, for me. Although some people are okay with that. I am in another group. Since I can't do anything and can only regret and upset about it endlessly, which is no use at all, the only thing that I can do in the future is not to go back. So, if things, unwanted things happen to you in Bali night club, don't blame this place. Acknowledge the fact that most things happened are not caused by the Balinese, but the people, often (or maybe always) the nonnative and foreigners (NOT the Balinese). So again, don't blame this place and its local.

The tourists and the non locals (like us) who need to behave and learn a little more respect to this land. This place and its people are undeniably beautiful, peaceful and kind.

From the Beautiful Goddess Island of Indonesia, Bali..