Mom

I once read a writer saying that he writes well not because he is better than others but because he feels more than others. One of an example, how hardship in life, brings the more beautiful things that we could witness, read this article, a man recreates photos with daughter after losing his wife.

 

Anyway, there is little things to do with what am about to write. That was just a random thought. :p

 

My parents have my sister and me. I have them, people who I treasure, for the past 27 years and their worth is getting bigger with days. Recently, I was in an argument with an aunt, who insisted that when a woman is married to someone, she should put the husband's family above anything else. I am definitely not all in for this thing. For me, if someone wants respect, they got to earn it. Moreover, both families should be equally important. They worth the same! My mom was there, didn't utter anything. Then, about a month ago, we attended a wedding reception. The MC was saying something that rhymes in Chinese, it was saying something like: A girl is like a 'princess' in her house, while she is married ('out'), she is the 'xiao' xi fu (literally translated as 'small' in law).

Then out of no where, my mom was saying: "Hear that? when you are in someone else's family you are the 'xiao' xi fu." On a split second, I was thinking that it's unexpected from her. She has been one of the tough lady that I ever know, I would expect her to be a type of person who demands for equality between woman and man. She works as hard as my dad! For her, girls don't belong only in the kitchen. In her time, that's something rare. One day I am going to write about her story, how she wanted so bad to go for higher education (equal to the current junior high school), but given no chance.

Anyway, I think about it from time to time for the past few weeks, then I realize the difference between my mom and me. She is selfless. She still holds the Chinese culture well, in a good way, moderate amount! She wants the best out of us, her daughters, be respected and loved by someone, yet she knows well that we are responsible to make that happen. We cannot be the common 'contemporary-daughter-in-law'. We should realize how the daughter in law now differ from the one from the 70s'.

Now do you know why I love my parents so much? They do not even have the bachelor degree that's said to be the key to success nowadays, but they live just fine, they live good, even a whole lot better than some of us! Lesson learned, Mom~

One last thing I would like to remember, last week during our conversation, she said: "Your dad loves his wife and children well..." I am so blessed to be in this family.

I love you so much, Mom~

 

Happy 2014 \(^0^)/

Here we are… If lucky enough, we are given full 12 months, 365 days, 8760 hours in 2014. What are we going to do with that? First, would like to wish everyone a happier New Year. Life has always been good to me and I can’t be more grateful. I hope it will continue on that way, and most importantly I would like to be better and kinder to myself too. That’s the goal this year! “Love me more, love myself more”

As usual, here are a few goals to work on:

1. Reduce my coffee consumption to thrice a week max. Wish me luck on this, I have been addicted to coffee lately and anything that causes addiction isn’t good.

2. Having a better sleep pattern, must sleep before 12 mid night! Seems easy but it’s really not for me. Fighting!

3. Reading! Apart from the usual novel that I read, I would like to improve myself with more educative books, a heavier reading material. The brain of mine may not be so empty, but it can be better too. As the saying goes, we die when we stop learning. I would like to keep myself alive as much as possible. That’s me being kind to myself.

4. Work smarter. Last year, the working schedule has been too hectic. Long working hours which is not necessarily efficient. I would like to award myself a day off, when the new semester begins in July. I pray hard that I can find a good teaching assistant too this year. The goal is

a. With the help of an assistant by mid of the year, I will target for 60% growth from 2013

b. Without the help of an assistant, I would like to target for a 20% growth

5. Writing – Long term goal, but I really would like to make this happen in this lifetime. It’s not necessarily money making, it’s just something that I have always loved to do. Reading works of others have inspired me, make me rich, and I would like to contribute in the same way to others. I really am… Pray and work hard!

6. Travelling is one of the things that will never been left out. I have financial goal to achieve too but I also don’t want to lose out the opportunity in making a life in the midst of making a living. This year, there maybe a few short trips that I would like to make, Malaysia for motoGP, Singapore to catch up with good friends and dental visit and one trip with dad and mom to an unconfirmed destination. That’s the minimum that I would like to have this year.

7. Braces off this year, before mid year!!! Be discipline in taking care of the result that is achieved after a 4-years-of-suffering! Brush well and twice a year visit to the dentist.

8. In walking the path of long distance relationship, I just want myself to be tougher, to have faith, trust and hope that things work fine between us. It’s been just over 3 months and I have experienced a few break down, couldn’t control the emotion, couldn’t be the support that I am expected to be. We have an unknown time period to just go with it, thus, being strong is the only option. Never know what will happen, in the mean time, we hope it will work out fine at the end.

9. This is the least important, yet, I would like to put it in. I haven’t been really buying myself ‘gadget’ for the past 2 years, instead I spent it on experience. That’s very fulfilling and I am happy with that. However, there is some ‘human’ part in me that really would like to get a hold of a new iPhone. =p

That’s pretty much of everything. And as how a prayer should go, we give thanks to what we have, so I would like to thank for the family that I have, good life that I am living, good friends that always there to support me, good partner that is good in his own way and the strangers that have sometimes there to show me how simple and beautiful life can be. Then I end it with the hope that things can go well, people can be happier and of course above all wishing everyone a true wealth in this world, health!

Happy New Year 2014~

Less than 3,

Lin ^ ^